The holidays can be a very stressful time of year for most everyone. Whether we're trying to purchase gifts for our children, our family, or our friends, we usually feel a great deal of anxiety. Trying to pick the “right gift” can stir anxiety within us as well as exchanging holiday greeting cards. The fear of hurting someone's feelings by not getting them a greeting card when they got you one is a very palpable feeling that we all feel this time of year. My first rule of thumb would be not to try to keep up with the Joneses. Do your best and not compare your purchases with others that you know in your neighborhood or your congregation. I'm asking you to consider not talking about your children's gifts with your friends. Also, try to remember that it's the season for giving and not getting, and if someone gives you a holiday greeting card, you are not obligated in any way, shape, or form to give them a card. Perhaps you could make a note of it and give them a card in a month or two from now, just letting them know that you're thankful to have them as a friend. That way, you might alleviate some guilt for not getting them a holiday card, and yet, you would not be finding yourself roped into this competition of making sure everything is fair between everybody that gives you a gift or a holiday greeting card. Regardless of your faith or lack thereof, try to remember that this season is supposed to be a season of happiness and of giving and of showing love to your friends and family that truly love you. In keeping with the feeling, as mentioned earlier, do not feel guilty over the family to whom you are not sending a greeting card. Some of us don't have the healthiest or the nicest of families, so we have to make our own families out of those great friends in our lives. It's tempting to look at the greeting card companies or the holiday commercials that a lot of companies produce showing a happy family gathered around a dinner table, wishing that it was you that was having that same experience. Perhaps you could make a list of things for which you are grateful. Maybe you could focus and reflect on that list daily throughout this holiday season. Whatever you do this holiday season, may I suggest that you work to be “merry and bright.” Avoid any emotional vampires, be it family or friends or coworkers. Focus on being happy, but focus on being happy by giving to others. My wish for you is that you all could have a wonderful time this holiday season.
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